Little Girl, Little Sword

I watched 'The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian' last night and was overwhelmed by the message it burned in my heart. (If you haven't seen the movie you might not want to read this until you do.) The scene that stole control of my emotions and left me whimpering like a puppy who just realized he ate all his food and his master will not be home for hours, was the screen shot at the end of the movie. We see young Lucy appear before an army, alone. She is standing there, in total peace, as she pulls out her tiny dagger and stands ready to fight.

My husband and I laughed because she looked so cute and pathetic just standing there with her miniature weapon. She is just a little girl with a little sword, who can't possibly take on the massive war that is raging before her. Then Aslan appeared. That was all it took. He opened his mouth and roared with a breath that devoured Lucy's enemies. End scene. But the end of the battle did not end the ache I felt lit in the depths of my heart. As I watched Lucy face an evil she knew she could not defeat, I felt as if I was watching myself. That I am merely a little girl, with nothing more than a metal nail file clutched in my palm, trying to win a fight with impossible odds. But the odds are not impossible for me. They are impossible for my enemies.

Lucy stood, then Aslan conquered. That was it. She trusted in the end result because she trusted in her protector. I see myself on a flickering screen before me and wonder if I have the courage to accept my own understanding of God. I know with him all things are possible, but am I willing to stand before evil and really know that my God will defeat it. To just stand there. To wait on God. This is what it takes to trust unconditionally. To stand in front of an army. Then God. That's it. Then God. I am alone, then God saves me. I am afraid, then God calms the waters. Then God restores my soul. Then God makes a way. Then God. Period.